So there has been a great deal of attention in the media recently that has triggered a wealth of thoughts and concepts to roar through my head and heart. First let me say that I love the judicial system and all that it was created to be. When we look at it on paper, everything fits perfectly. It eludes to the notion that we are all as citizens given the right to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. Unfortunately, it takes humans, with individual emotions and personal motivations to bring that system to life and this is where things get muddy and messy. That mess is where injustice happens and causes outrage and frustration. But as one of my friends posted "we must address the pink elephant in the room" I began to think about it and realized that one cannot acknowledge what one doesn't see.
See, as a black woman who was raised in the south in from 1977-1995, I was able to see what it was like to be of a demographic that was not wanted. I recall being in kindergarten and the blonde hair blue eyed boy wanting to play in my hair that my momma had freshly pressed for pictures that day. I also remember his friend telling him that if he touched my hair he would not be his friend anymore cause he would be a "grease monkey like Natasha". I remember being called a nigger in 6th grade, telling the teacher and her ignoring me. I remember it happening again and being so upset that I pushed a kid and my mother telling me that I should have never responded that way because that is not what I was so clearly this kid was not talking to me. I remember being in High School and hearing the white kids shun the white girl who dated one of the star athletes at our school who happened to be black. I recall them saying that once she had been used by a nigger she was even more trash than she already was (because she was from a lower income part of our area). In 1995 I remember standing in formation at Ft Leonardwood , MO on day two of bootcamp as the only black female in the first rank and hearing one of the males in rank behind me stating that "the only nigger I would ever _____ is one that looks her...you know, the one's who don't have hair that looks like wool off of a damn sheep." (I didn't respond because my momma said CLEARLY he wasn't talking to me because I'm not a nigger). I have been called out of my name, I have been degraded, I have been spit on and threatened to be killed if I didn't "get my black ___ back to Africa where I belong." Not in the 1920's, 1940's or 1960's before marches were held that demanded for us to be treated equally. This all happened after numerous people died to say that I was just like any other little boy or girl born in this country. I was American and because of this, I was entitled to the same rights and freedoms as my white counterparts. Right?
So when things like the OJ Simpson case arise and he is acquitted for a murder that clearly pointed to him having murdered his former wife and friend, blacks did not rejoice because "we pulled one over on them." The celebration was for a few reasons. One was that it meant that the system was not just messed up for the rich white people but it was messed up across the board so we were no longer going to suffer injustice alone. Two was that "now they see how we feel." It sounds harsh but this is just the raw truth of it all. Most blacks felt that he was guilty but him being acquitted had more to do with us seeing that we were being given the same "favorable" treatment in court as whites than it had to do with us believing he was innocent.
This State of Florida (Trayvon Martin) vs George Zimmerman happens and reality hits. Black kid (who Zimmerman referred to as "F___g Coons") is walking down the street on a rainy night. He is approached by a grown man (after being told NOT to pursue) with a loaded gun and loses his life. Even in death, this young man is vilified to support why it was OK for Mr Zimmerman to "defend himself". How was Mr. Zimmerman to know that Martin smoked weed? How was Mr Zimmerman to know that Mr Martin had been suspended from school? How was Mr Zimmerman to know that Mr Martin "liked to fight" or that he had pictures flipping the middle finger on his facebook page? This "F____g coon" looked suspicious to Mr Zimmerman based on his skin color.
Now without completely rehashing the trial, this is all that I need to relate to. Being marked because your skin is darker than the next. This is something that a white person will not understand. They don't understand it because the times that a white person has been stalked in their neighborhood is probably low if at all. Many blacks can relate to merely being stalked in a high end fashion store. So in the defense of the Caucasian-American, they can't understand what they have never experienced. Sadly this makes it too easy to go into a state of denial. The mentality seems to be one of "Brown won in 1954, so it's equal now." No, it's just not as openly accepted for people to be discriminated against. So the "Pink Elephant" is only seen by those that are willing to acknowledge that there is still a problem. There's no problem if you can't see it. It's kind of like termites. It's not until the frame of the house starts to get shaky that the owner will say "maybe we need to get this checked" and once the walls are opened up, the owner can see that there is an infestation threatening the foundation of what you've worked so hard for.
So let's peel the outer wall down and show what's really there. Let's look to our brothers and sisters (regardless of their racial background) and see what's really the root of all of this.Let's find out why are the boards creeking and why did the hammer blow clean through the wall when I went to simply hang the picture? Let's have some open dialogue about why this hurts so much and be ready to work toward fixing it. It might take some time and I'm sure it's going to be painful but if we start now, we can really do some damage for the greater good in this life we've been given.
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